Family Living: Abbott Style

 Milestones. This blog is full of milestones.  There are some milestones missing as the years have progressed and my diligence on blogging has faded.  But I wanted to be sure to write this one down.  Haley is now 10.  A decade old.  Her emotions are up and down.  I attribute it to equal parts: I am a disaster of a parent and puberty hormones.  Let me set the scene. This fall, both Haley and Owen have been playing fall ball. Ya'll life is busy with kids in sports.  Owen's coach has a son about Haley's age.  And slowly over the weeks, I have noticed them making googly eyes at one another.  They've been discussing Zelda and books, only deepening their affections for one another.  About a month ago she told me--"I don't know why but I can't stop thinking about him."  Oh girl.  One week, we overheard Haley's 'wingman' coaching her--"Take down your hair and do *this* (makes head motion making hair flow) like your hair is bl...

Let me start by going on the record and saying- I don't prescribe to the whole 'self-care' movement. Before you dismiss me as a self righteous ass-hat, hear me out.  According to a quick google search self-care is defined by " any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health." In and of itself, that doesn't sound like such a bad thing. But there are a number of things I have done throughout the years due to my entitlement to "self-care". Hitting the gym (for HOURS a day). Nightly glass   bottle of wine. Rowdy girls' night. Social media scrolling. Netflix Binges.  After all, taking care of me helps take care of those around me.  It is a slippery slope. Tim Keller once Tweeted, " Sin isnʼt only doing bad things; it’s more fundamentally making good things into ultimate things. Sin is building your life and meaning on anything, even a very good thing, more than on God. Whatever we build our...

Today I was catching up with a friend when she thoughtfully wished me well during the month of February. Through the years, she has learned how much I loath the winter months. I tend to struggle, particularly, in January and February.  The holidays are over. It is dark all the time. And the weather sucks. I read somewhere that 2 hours of outdoor time is the new 10,000 steps. That resonated deeply.  Luckily, this year--the seasonal depression didn't hit me like years past.  Partially because, leading up to the holidays, I was already at war with my mental health. I mean, 2020, who wasn't? Since having Jackson, things--emotionally--just haven't been the same.  I dealt with some pp anxiety that I ended up seeking help for--and found SO much help and relief.   But atlas.... Lingering under the surface was something new.  Irritability. Anger. ---And like a wave, during certain parts of my hormonal cycle, that anger would over take me. In 2019, I spoke to m...

It has been awhile.   I've decided to just jump in like no time as passed and see what happens.  I am trying desperately to get my social media usage under control. Insert "The Social Dilemma"  plug here. I have every reason to delete all social media. And every excuse not to. For now, I have decided to use the season of Lent as a time to focus on moderation. I have set a screen time limit on my phone for social media. At exactly 9:45 this morning, I hit my screen time limit.  Day 3 and my resolve is already waining.  During this soul searching pertaining to my technology/social media usage  (or maybe perhaps, how it has gripped my life and started using me), I felt nostalgic for the days I would just sit down and write. Writing, second to running--I find very therapeutic.  I want to write a book. I have no idea what about.   Or what genre.  But if this is a goal that I want to take seriously, I must write and I must write often....

It is a funny thing. I often look back over the years of words poured out over the blog and laugh. So young. Naive.  Immature. Words filled the screen--gushing about raising my daughter--mostly.  Life.  Fitness.  Being a wife. Looking back, it feels like a simpler time.  While I wouldn't have thought so at the time. Now, I read and wonder-how did I get so off track? Don't get me wrong, I have experienced SO much growth over the past 9 years. But the passion for parenting that had me writing day after day after day--vanished. There are a million little things. Raising toddlers is hard. Raising two kids is hard. Raising three kids is hard. It was no longer the new thing in my life. I've been at this parenting thing for 8 years now. So many factors. But at some point, I stopped cherishing parenting and started enduring it.  For awhile now, my prayers have been asking God to give me more patience with my kids. That I could be a mom that wou...

Let this post serve as a reminder. When I look back and desperately miss when my kids were "little"....... Toddlers are the literal worst.

Here I sit with an unfamiliar feeling on an oh-so-familiar night.... Almost 10 years of marriage and 3 kids later. I still don't know what it feels like to have a 'traditional' marriage.  And maybe, a traditional marriage doesn't actually exist. You know what I mean? The whole, leave-it-to-beaver-dream-marriage: Husband and wife wake up together. Husband goes to work. Wife attends to house and children Husband comes home Eat dinner as a family Bedtime as a family. Go to bed with husband, at the same time. Rinse. Lather. Repeat. I know it is almost a taboo thing to want in this feminist era. But this was the dream for me. However, I also signed up for cop-wife-life. And that is anything but Leave-it-to-Beaver. Over the past years, I have learned to make lemonade out of lemons. I have learned to manage my lonely nights with wine and Netflix. I have embraced the pros of our flipped schedule. And the fact that I have the flexibility in my jobs to be ho...