Here I sit with an unfamiliar feeling on an oh-so-familiar night....
Almost 10 years of marriage and 3 kids later. I still don't know what it feels like to have a 'traditional' marriage. And maybe, a traditional marriage doesn't actually exist. You know what I mean? The whole, leave-it-to-beaver-dream-marriage:
Husband and wife wake up together.
Husband goes to work.
Wife attends to house and children
Husband comes home
Eat dinner as a family
Bedtime as a family.
Go to bed with husband, at the same time.
Rinse. Lather. Repeat.
I know it is almost a taboo thing to want in this feminist era. But this was the dream for me. However, I also signed up for cop-wife-life. And that is anything but Leave-it-to-Beaver.
Over the past years, I have learned to make lemonade out of lemons. I have learned to manage my lonely nights with wine and Netflix. I have embraced the pros of our flipped schedule. And the fact that I have the flexibility in my jobs to be home when he is home, doesn't fall flat.
I absolutely realize I am the epitome of a spoiled brat. I DO appreciate the life that we have. I am thankful.
But tonight, I can't help be overwhelmed with the idea that this is my last lonely night for a while. For the upcoming months ahead, I get a taste of the "Leave-it-to-Beaver" schedule.
But alas, a 5 am alarm awaits....you can't have it all. But tonight, it sure feels like I do. Tonight is my last lonely night.
Almost 10 years of marriage and 3 kids later. I still don't know what it feels like to have a 'traditional' marriage. And maybe, a traditional marriage doesn't actually exist. You know what I mean? The whole, leave-it-to-beaver-dream-marriage:
Husband and wife wake up together.
Husband goes to work.
Wife attends to house and children
Husband comes home
Eat dinner as a family
Bedtime as a family.
Go to bed with husband, at the same time.
Rinse. Lather. Repeat.
I know it is almost a taboo thing to want in this feminist era. But this was the dream for me. However, I also signed up for cop-wife-life. And that is anything but Leave-it-to-Beaver.
Over the past years, I have learned to make lemonade out of lemons. I have learned to manage my lonely nights with wine and Netflix. I have embraced the pros of our flipped schedule. And the fact that I have the flexibility in my jobs to be home when he is home, doesn't fall flat.
I absolutely realize I am the epitome of a spoiled brat. I DO appreciate the life that we have. I am thankful.
But tonight, I can't help be overwhelmed with the idea that this is my last lonely night for a while. For the upcoming months ahead, I get a taste of the "Leave-it-to-Beaver" schedule.
But alas, a 5 am alarm awaits....you can't have it all. But tonight, it sure feels like I do. Tonight is my last lonely night.
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