So, I would really love to take a course this semester. So I was looking around seeing if any of the colleges offered something I would be interested in. I already have my Bachelor's Degree but have no real vision in what direction I would want a Master's degree in, so I'm not currently seeking that path. I just want a little something something. I am a nerd, and would gladly become a 'hobby student'. You know 'just for fun'. We all have things we are good at. My 'thing' just happens to be being a student. I love learning. I love being challenged and educated. I've been able to stay content with humoring my own curiosities and preforming my own research on various subjects, but I am getting to the point where I need more. I feel like my intellectual growth is beginning to become stunted.
How did I come to this revelation? I spent a few hours on the IRS website over the past few days because I am curious about various tax things that apply to us. When we go to file taxes, it is never very straight forward. Technically, it is as if Ian owns his own business in addition to his position with the government, so we have a professional help us with our taxes. Last year, I was totally ignorant to most of the filing process. This year, I wanted to be educated and prepared. And with the selling of our house and having a baby, I just wanted to be prepared going into the tax season this year.
I need a hobby to stimulate my mind, because really? Who surfs the IRS website for fun?
JCCC offered the perfect course for me. I am dying to take the class but the times never work out with our schedule. So I went to the KCKCC website to see if they offered a comparable course. Plus, I have already had 3 different professors in the English department at KCKCC and really enjoyed their classes and ended up having an enriching experience. I was hoping one of those three professors would offer the type of course I am seeking.
I don't know. I am so conflicted. I feel selfish taking a course 'just because'. Not only would it take time away from Haley, but it would just be an added something for me to balance on my plate.
Decisions, decisions....
I always wanted to be a SAHM. I am grateful I went to college and received my degree. I don't for a second regret my decision to become a young SAHM. Not only do I enjoy what I am doing, but I have a philosophical belief of what mothering should be, and having someone else raise my kid for 40 plus hours a week is just not part of that belief.
Chances are, I will never actually use my degree in the sense of starting a 'career'. By the time I would seek employment, my degree will be basically-- expired. The current plan is that I will become a part-time substitute teacher whenever my kidlet(s) start school (if we don't choose to home school, which frankly, is an option we would consider). So in a way, my degree will help me in being an effect substitute teacher, but I just don't see myself ever taking a full time position as an elementary teacher.
So because I never picture myself in a career setting; does that mean I should stop learning and taking courses? Am I truly retired? I just don't know. I'm so conflicted. As much as I love education, it is a disservice for me to never hold a position as an educator.
But then on the other side of things...
While I will never truly be done being a mother, I wonder, what will I have when my child(ren) have outgrown me. Obviously my marriage is a given, but what else? Someday, I will not be needed. Then what? My ultimate dream would be becoming a college professor. But how do I get there, if I never go into the career world? At 40, I can't just decide to be a professor after not ever being a 'professional'. I am pretty sure the community college doesn't offer courses in being a SAHM or a homemaker. What would I even teach?
I have a vision to how I would like my future to look, but I just can't seem to find the right brush to paint it....
*sigh* Isn't it great that I live in a country where my biggest problem is too many choices. My heart goes out to the women in other countries who don't have the choice.
How did I come to this revelation? I spent a few hours on the IRS website over the past few days because I am curious about various tax things that apply to us. When we go to file taxes, it is never very straight forward. Technically, it is as if Ian owns his own business in addition to his position with the government, so we have a professional help us with our taxes. Last year, I was totally ignorant to most of the filing process. This year, I wanted to be educated and prepared. And with the selling of our house and having a baby, I just wanted to be prepared going into the tax season this year.
I need a hobby to stimulate my mind, because really? Who surfs the IRS website for fun?
JCCC offered the perfect course for me. I am dying to take the class but the times never work out with our schedule. So I went to the KCKCC website to see if they offered a comparable course. Plus, I have already had 3 different professors in the English department at KCKCC and really enjoyed their classes and ended up having an enriching experience. I was hoping one of those three professors would offer the type of course I am seeking.
I don't know. I am so conflicted. I feel selfish taking a course 'just because'. Not only would it take time away from Haley, but it would just be an added something for me to balance on my plate.
Decisions, decisions....
I always wanted to be a SAHM. I am grateful I went to college and received my degree. I don't for a second regret my decision to become a young SAHM. Not only do I enjoy what I am doing, but I have a philosophical belief of what mothering should be, and having someone else raise my kid for 40 plus hours a week is just not part of that belief.
Chances are, I will never actually use my degree in the sense of starting a 'career'. By the time I would seek employment, my degree will be basically-- expired. The current plan is that I will become a part-time substitute teacher whenever my kidlet(s) start school (if we don't choose to home school, which frankly, is an option we would consider). So in a way, my degree will help me in being an effect substitute teacher, but I just don't see myself ever taking a full time position as an elementary teacher.
So because I never picture myself in a career setting; does that mean I should stop learning and taking courses? Am I truly retired? I just don't know. I'm so conflicted. As much as I love education, it is a disservice for me to never hold a position as an educator.
But then on the other side of things...
While I will never truly be done being a mother, I wonder, what will I have when my child(ren) have outgrown me. Obviously my marriage is a given, but what else? Someday, I will not be needed. Then what? My ultimate dream would be becoming a college professor. But how do I get there, if I never go into the career world? At 40, I can't just decide to be a professor after not ever being a 'professional'. I am pretty sure the community college doesn't offer courses in being a SAHM or a homemaker. What would I even teach?
I have a vision to how I would like my future to look, but I just can't seem to find the right brush to paint it....
*sigh* Isn't it great that I live in a country where my biggest problem is too many choices. My heart goes out to the women in other countries who don't have the choice.
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